Baby's Choice

Thanks to Gina for sharing this poem with me. I always wondered... maybe God made me wait so long to become a mother, not because it wasn't the right time for ME, but because it wasn't the right time for our baby. Perhaps he or she was saved to enter the world at a special chosen moment. Anyway, this poem made me think those thoughts again...

Did you ever think, dear Mother,
As the seeds of me you sowed,
As you breathed new life inside of me
And slowly watched me grow,
In all your dreams about me
When you planned me out so well,
When you couldn't wait to have me there
Inside your heart to dwell,

Did you ever think that maybe,
I was planning for you, too,
And choosing for my very own
A mother just like you?
A mother who smelled sweet and who
had hands so creamy white,
A tender, loving creature
Who would soothe me in the night?

Did you ever think in all those days
While you were coming due,
That as you planned a life for me
I sought a life with you?
And now as I lay in your arms,
I wonder if you knew
While you were busy making me,
I was choosing you!

~ Colleen M. Story ~

Dreams of a Baby

Published by: A.D. Mariano

Our arms are empty. Our souls are tired.
Our hearts are heavy and faith feels old.
The world sees us as selfish, too
For we desire a child to hold.

We've read the books and heard opinions
And endured the loss of hope,
While those around us have the nerve
To advise us how to cope.

We've seen the pros and followed charge
We've thought we'd never do,
And yet the crib stays empty
And we feel empty too.

I don't know where this road goes
As we treat it with much fears
That we will wind up heartbroken
With a cradle full of tears.

The Weaver

My life is but a weaving,
between my God and me,
I let Him choose the colors,
He worketh steadily.

Ofttimes He weaveth sorrow,
and I, within my heart,
Forget He sees the pattern
while I see only part.

The dark threads are as needful,
in the skillful weaver's hand,
As threads of gold and silver
in the pattern He has planned.

Not till the loom is silent,
and the shuttles cease to fly,
Will God unroll the canvas,
and explain the reason why.

(Anonymous)

I know I can't wait to see what my canvas looks like one day... I'm sure when I do it will have all been worth it. I hope it will be beautiful!

Hope Hiding There

"Whatever you do, don't look down."
That's all the advice they can give.
But you keep looking down,
'cause you think that's where everything is.

It's harder to see things can change,
that night can be conquered at dawn.
'Cause the darkness you feel
is unbearably real
and strong.

It's just how it goes.
No matter what you do,
the way through the fog
has been hidden from view.

But around every corner,
though you're unaware,
protected by grace
in the face of despair,
there is hope hiding there.

You might think it strange
hope would hide.
It seems like a cowardly deed.
But it's saving its power
for your desperate hour
of need.

And all of that strength
and good it can do,
awaits being found
safe and sound,
just for you.

'Cause around every corner,
though you're unaware,
protected by grace
in the face of despair,
there is hope hiding there.

And ears cannot hear it
and eyes cannot see,
but hearts are drawn near it
if they choose to be.

Around every corner,
though you're unaware,
protected by grace
in the face of despair...

there is hope hiding there.

-Michael McLean

If I was blind

If I was blind, would they say this to me:
Just relax, and soon you will see!
Would they tell me that maybe this “isn’t my time”?
Would those words even cross their mind?

Or say “Maybe not everyone was meant to see,
And since I can, you should be happy for me!”
Or tell me about a friend who was also blind
But now she can see…All in good time!

Would they joke about how they can see with no trouble!
And then tell me to snap out of my depressed little bubble.
Or call me lucky, with a tone that is curt
Because, when they’re tired, their eyes sometimes hurt!

Would they tell me that they know just how I feel
Because they have to wear contacts and it’s no big deal?
Or say, “Once you go out and buy a walking cane,
You’ll be able to see - it’s just all a big game!”

Would they tell me, “Though vision was meant for the masses,
Just think of all the money you’ll save on sunglasses!
Or would they give me some kind of home remedy instead,
Like eating an herb, or standing on my head.

Would they tell me I don’t need this medical stuff,
And just say that I’m not trying hard enough!
Would they say, “Just enjoy the time you can’t see,
For once you can, it’s all over, so just be happy!”

Would they think I was crazy, gambling money on a “cure”,
After all being blind is not life threatening, for sure!
And when I had treatments, would the insurance deny,
Calling the gift of sight “optional” and making me cry?

Something tells me the answer to these questions is No
Blindness is a medical issue and so,
Any amount of advice would do no good
A doctor is needed, this is understood

But for some reason when it comes to fertility
It blurs these thoughts of reality
Everyone’s an expert, everyone knows a cure
Everyone knows someone who’s beaten this before.

Infertility is a medical condition
To be left to doctors, not our own premonition
Prayers and listening, understanding’s the way
To get through each and every hard day.

I am infertile… Will you say this to me?
I love you, I support you, whatever may be.
Throughout the journey, I’m here for you.
Cycle after cycle, I’ll help you through.


**Just a note: I hope this poem doesn't offend anyone. I know that being blind is nothing like being infertile. I can adopt or seek treatment. I was just making the comparison that many times people don't think of infertility as being a medical condition and that it can be solved by just relaxing or not thinking about it. :)