Saturday, March 13, 2010

Freedom

A year ago, I wrote that I was having a rough time. I had been having a rough time for quite a while. Although I wrote that I accepted help from my doctor, I did not expressly say what that help was.

My doctor prescribed 10mg of a drug called Lexapro. This was later increased to 20mg. I remember the day I picked up the prescription. Inside the pamphlet that came with it, I read Lexapro is typically taken for 6 months to a year. I remember thinking I would be different. I would need to use these pills until I finally got pregnant or became a mom. I couldn't imagine I would be able to function again without help.

Well here we are, one year later, and I am completely off of the medication. I even weened off during a particularly rough time period emotionally. And I still did it.

And, although I am still saddened by the current state of affairs, I am not hopeless. I have bad days, but every day is not bad.

This last year has reinforced my belief that depression can begin situational, but can become a literal chemical imbalance. I firmly believe I had that imbalance. A year on this medication helped to resolve that imbalance, and now I am making it on my own again.

I am so happy to finally experience freedom. Not freedom from the medication so much, but freedom from the dark place I was in for so long. I am grateful that there are medical advances that could help me get my life back. I am disappointed in those uneducated people who continue to judge or degrade someone for having the courage to seek help. I am proud I had that courage.

4 comments:

Cyndi W said...

Blogger Cyndi W said...

I am so happy for you and am so glad you found the inner strength to be able to accomplish such a task, (Surely not an easy one)! I enjoy reading all of your post, they are so enlightening, even though we all go through different struggles.

Verne ran into your Dad this weekend, and I would love to have an opportunity to re-connect with your Mom let me give you my e-mail. It is vernesgirl@gmail.com. I look forward to hearing from her.

Thanks Again, for sharing so much in your posts, I know you reach a lot of women.

Amy Nielson said...

I am proud that you had that courage too. It is NOT an easy thing to admit (well it wasn't for me) and I also am grateful for good meds. :)

Savannah said...

I think I'm ready to admit I need help. Michelle, could you email me privately at sourbonk@yahoo.com

Kristie said...

You know how I feel about antidepressants. I am so happy that you were able to receive that help - and that you now feel free. You are an inspiration.

FAITH IN GOD MEANS HAVING FAITH IN HIS TIMING.