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Madly in love but sadly infertile - Finally parents thanks to God above and the miracle of modern medicine!
Ryan and Michelle
Madly in love but sadly infertile - Finally parents thanks to God above and the miracle of modern medicine!
Purpose of this Blog
I started this blog back in 2006, when I first began treatments for infertility. At that time, it had been three years since we had started trying to begin our family. Once treatments began, it became clear that infertility was not a quick detour on this road of life; rather, it's a journey.
But at the end of it all, when those beautiful children finally come into my life, I want them to know that they were loved years before they were mine.
So, I am writing this for me and for them. And if it allows you to peak into my world, then that's good too.
But at the end of it all, when those beautiful children finally come into my life, I want them to know that they were loved years before they were mine.
So, I am writing this for me and for them. And if it allows you to peak into my world, then that's good too.
Our Cheerleaders!
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OUR DIAGNOSIS:
UNEXPLAINED INFERTILITY
Treatments
Song of the Moment
My Journey...
- Sept 1996: Our first date - We were 16 years old
- Aug 2000: Married my high school sweetheart
- Jan 2002: Joined a trying-to-conceive online group
- Aug 2003: Officially began TTC
- April 2004: Got an ovulation kit
- July 2004: Referral to Dr. Synn - Fertility Specialist
- Sept 2004: Did a battery of fertility tests. All normal.
- Oct 2006: Began blogging my fertility experiences
- Oct 2006: 1st round of Clomid - BFN
- Dec 2006: 2nd round of Clomid (with patches and progesterone) - BFN
- Jan 2007: 3rd round of Clomid (with patches, progesterone, and IUI) - BFN
- Feb 2007: 4th round of Clomid (with patches, progesterone, and IUI) - BFN
- June 2007: Laparoscopic and Hysteroscopic Surgery - No endo found
- July 2007: Repeated all fertility-related blood work. All numbers look perfect.
- April 2008: First acupuncture appointment
- May 2008: Thyroid panel testing - All normal
- Sept 2008: Began sessions with a psychologist
- Jan 2009: Started Treatment for Depression
- Sept 2009: Repeated Bloodwork - Numbers still normal
- Oct 2009: Back on the acupuncture bandwagon
- Jan 2010: Another Break
- March 2010: Fully weened off the antidepressants
- May 2010: Back to the RE; Second HSG. Tubes all clear.
- July 2010: 1st Medicated IUI Cycle with Follistim - BFN
- Aug 2010: 2nd Medicated IUI Cycle with Follistim - First Ever BFP!!!
- Sept 2010: Miscarriage at 5 weeks
- Oct 2010: 3rd Medicated IUI Cycle with Follistim - BFN
- Nov 2010: 4th Medicated IUI Cycle with Follistim - BFN
- Jan 2011: 5th Medicated IUI Cycle with Follistim - BFP!
- Oct 2011: FINALLY held our baby girl in our arms. Life is Good.
"You will come to know that what appears today to be a sacrifice will prove instead to be the greatest investment that you will ever make."-Gordon B Hinckley
Everywhere in nature we are taught the lessons of patience and waiting. We want things a long time before we get them, and the fact that we wanted them a long time makes them all the more precious when they come.
- Joseph F. Smith
- Joseph F. Smith
Hope Springs Eternal
FAITH
Faith in something greater than ourselves enables us to do what we have said we'll do, to press forward when we are tired or hurt or afraid, to keep going when the challenge seems overwhelming and the course is entirely uncertain.
- Gordon B. Hinckley
- Gordon B. Hinckley
My Desire
What we consistently desire, over time is what we we will eventually become and what we will receive in eternity.
Neal A. Maxwell
Neal A. Maxwell
The Pain of Infertility...
My Poetry:
If I Was Blind
My Videos:
Faith and Fertility...
A Year in the Life of Infertility...
Carry Your Cross...
His Hands...
25 comments:
I don't even know what to say. I am hurting so bad for you right now. Hold each other tight...HUGS!
Oh I am so sorry. I know there's nothing anyone can say to fix this or make it better. You and Ryan are in our prayers.
Oh no!!!! You know I can understand somewhat how you are feeling, having been there myself just 2 months ago. So horrible to finally get that positive test just to lose it...I'm sorry, big hugs and prayers to you and your DH...if you ever need to talk to someone who can understand, feel free to email me anytime. Hugs!
I am so heartbroken for you guys. Sending love and warm thoughts, and keeping you close to my heart.
I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending lots of prayers your way.
I'm so very sorry. My heart aches for you.
"This too shall pass"
((HUGS))
Many tears being shed for you and your husband right now.
Oh Michelle...I am so so sorry. My heart hurts for you. I love you...here for you. I know you have a lot of support so I never want to seem overbearing, but seriously know that I am here for you if you need anything. Love you.
Devastated - I am so sorry.There are no words.
makingmemom.blogspot.com
no words can take away the hurt. encouraging words seem worthless, just know that you are in our thoughts and prayers. it's SO hard! and unfair! and hurtful. i'm sorry.
I am so sorry. We've been there twice. We are praying for you extra hard.
I just lost my baby too.......and it is the most painful thing I have ever experienced.....every time I think about it I want to throw up. Its like there is no way to escape the pain and no one I can talk to that will make me feel better. My heart is with you and I know there is nothing I can to bring peace except something that someone told me......its ok to feel hurt and sad, its ok to grieve.
somedaymine.blogspot.com
Dear Michelle,
I am so sorry to hear of your loss, so soon after great celebration. You have worked so hard for this, and it is not fair that you had to lose such a precious gift.
no no no no...oh no. I am sooo sorry for your loss. =(
my prayers go out to you and your family.
I am so sorry. Just know that we are all praying for you very hard. You are in my thoughts all the time and will continue to be.
I am so very very sorry -- praying for you and your husband's strength.
I'm so sorry. May you find comfort and peace in our Saviors love. You'll be in our prayers.
Michelle,
I recently stumbled upon your blog but I don't believe it was "by accident." I want to encourage you. I also tried for many, many years to become pregnant and had "unexplained infertility." Two miscarriages, 3 ectopics, surgery, more poking, prodding and invasive procedures than I'd like to remember but I now have 2 kiddos. They are 7 years apart; 3 years to conceive the 1st and 7 years to conceive the 2nd. I will never understand why we had to go through so much to become parents or why God's timing was what it was. But I always held on to God's promise that there would be babies. I will be praying for you and will be waiting expectantly for your miracle!
- Shannon
Oh, my heart ached when I read that... I am so sorry Michelle... praying for you and Ryan today~
I am absolutely heartbroken for you. I can sypathize and empathize with where you are. Please know that you remain in my prayers. (((Hugs)))
I am so terribly sorry. There isn't anything that I can possibly say to make you feel better, so please just know that you are in my prayers.
I am so sorry. I know it hurts.
we don't know eachother but i ran across your blog through a friend's and i felt the need to give you some encouragement...
my husband and i have been married for 8 years and had been "trying" for at least 5 years to get pregnant with no luck. eventually we gave up and figured that we would look into other options when he was finished with school. as much as i acted "ok" with this "plan", i always feared that we would have a long road ahead. everything changed when this march i tested positive on a pregnancy test and realized i was 2 months along. i had no idea because i have never been regular, among having other issues.
i hope that maybe our story gives you a little hope. i know that i was convinced i was infertile after trying for over 5 years to get pregnant with no success. i wish you both the best and am touched by your story more than you know! please don't lose faith-anything is possible!
We am so so sorry about your baby. We love you, Michelle and Ryan.
Michelle,
I've read your blog for awhile now, but have never commented. I just wanted to say that I am so so sorry for your loss. I miscarried my first child as well and the pain is overwhelming. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
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