tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1618559263667408983.post3817055423712245046..comments2023-10-10T03:01:28.014-07:00Comments on In Pursuit of Parenthood: This is how some hubbys comfort their wife...RMCarterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09444163961125333919noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1618559263667408983.post-20720777854079285322009-08-26T08:47:14.449-07:002009-08-26T08:47:14.449-07:00Anonymous - I am sorry that your hubby is not givi...Anonymous - I am sorry that your hubby is not giving you the support you need right now. I went through years, too, where I wanted to start a family soooo bad I was in despair, and Ryan was ambivalent about it. There were many times he flat out told me he was "tired of hearing about it" and "tired of a wife that was always crying". I think that it is really, really hard for a man to see someone he loves hurt so much and not be able to 'fix' it. There is also probably a part of him that is scared to death that he has a fertility problem and could be the 'cause' of your pain. So, to fight those feelings off, they are ambivalent. <br /><br />Sometimes infertility is just about waiting. Waiting for a baby, yes. But sometimes it is about waiting for your partner to see things the way you do. He may never fully get there but you just put your head down and plow through anyway. At some point, the hope is, he'll see it from your side. After six years, my hubby is just starting to get there. It's been slow, but there is progress. I pray that day comes soon for you!<br /><br />Again, I am sorry you have to go through this at all. Infertility sucks.RMCarterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09444163961125333919noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1618559263667408983.post-23652294900056465102009-08-25T10:03:31.151-07:002009-08-25T10:03:31.151-07:00I wish someone could teach my husband how to say s...I wish someone could teach my husband how to say something comforting. We've been married nearly 5 years, all my married friends have babies already despite being married for less time than I have. Despite trying for a baby for what seems like an eternity, I simply can't get pregnant and my husband just shrugs and says that sometimes it takes years - like that actually helps??!! He refuses to go to the doctor or be part of fertility treatment and refuses to consider adoption. The only way he wants a baby is if he gets me pregnant but refuses to accept that maybe we need some help. I've reached the point of absolute despair; I just go through the motions but I stopped enjoying sex with him years ago. There's so little left of me now that even if I did miraculously get pregnant, what kind of mother would I be? The kind of woman who accepts being tormented for years instead of having the strength to go to a doctor and get help.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1618559263667408983.post-35533804910585573152009-04-20T08:59:00.000-07:002009-04-20T08:59:00.000-07:00Doesn't it bug you that you are always classified ...Doesn't it bug you that you are always classified as a newlywed because you don't have kids!! We get so tired of that!! You have an awesome husband!! It sure helps to have someone like him to help you through the rough patches. I hope you are doing well.James and Krestahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15061310234300792468noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1618559263667408983.post-30510619359342419602009-04-15T12:25:00.000-07:002009-04-15T12:25:00.000-07:00that is awesome and sounds almost exactly like wha...that is awesome and sounds almost exactly like what my husband might say to me! Just found your blog today... <br /><br />here is the one I keep secret... not sure why but I will only share it through a comment minname.blogspot.comMalindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03416889780399321547noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1618559263667408983.post-56864382356913786782009-03-23T12:35:00.000-07:002009-03-23T12:35:00.000-07:00Ryan is SOOOOO funny. What a gift he has, both in...Ryan is SOOOOO funny. What a gift he has, both in you and in humor. But honestly, not having kids is probably only part of the reason you are mistaken for newlyweds. You and Ryan both look so young, and that is a compliment.Lunahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14810868726568553429noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1618559263667408983.post-3934653067301277132009-03-22T10:10:00.000-07:002009-03-22T10:10:00.000-07:00I love it. I miss Ryan's humor. Boy did he make ...I love it. I miss Ryan's humor. Boy did he make us laugh back in high school.Shannonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10086044783518069623noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1618559263667408983.post-26808693995667646862009-03-21T21:01:00.000-07:002009-03-21T21:01:00.000-07:00The question about you being a newlywed bothered m...The question about you being a newlywed bothered me too, even though it wasn't directed at me. I think I get too wrapped up in what my friends are going through sometimes. :) I'm really glad you came to the Enrichment.Amy Nielsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09572773962428046122noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1618559263667408983.post-12823724718519513452009-03-21T15:32:00.000-07:002009-03-21T15:32:00.000-07:00Does it make things worse to know that even after ...Does it make things worse to know that even after the first token kid, I still get put in the "not enough kids" category? I totally thought 1 was enough to curb the awful, hurtful categories problem...um, no! Esp. in my neighborhood! :( Most of the girls in my neighborhood my age have 3 or 4 or even 5.) So just when I think I am in the "club"...I get ALL the time...oh, just wait till you have more. OR you don't know what it's like until you have more than 1. OR I really can't watch your kid, I have x amount of kids, just wait till you have more than 1and you'll know what I mean...etc. Ugh! Michelle, I really don't think it ever ends. I REALLY try hard not to use the same "club" lingo with anyone...it never seems to end...depressing as that is. I ask Luke every once in a while when I will finally be in the "club". My struggle and goal is to not want to be in the "club"...and not caring what people say...<BR/>I'm at 7 yrs and I get "only 1 child?" a lot. I also get "2 kids in 1 yr? Wow, you are going to have your hands full!" Ummm, yeah, when you wait 6 yrs to have kids, any child is welcome, however close they are...I'll take whatever I can get and whatever HF wants to send my way...<BR/>I'm rambling, sorry you got put in that category, that sucks. So good to have a great BF in a husband, eh? If anything, doesn't the trial of infertility make you glad that HF put you with the partner he did? It does me, I don't know what I would do without Luke! :)threelittlebackseatdrivers.blogspot.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00887123387696538836noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1618559263667408983.post-71967687434714181952009-03-21T10:40:00.000-07:002009-03-21T10:40:00.000-07:00I can so relate to this. You hubby sounds like a g...I can so relate to this. You hubby sounds like a great man and a lot like my DH. Good Luck to you!Michellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03661220372372737455noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1618559263667408983.post-12878679146847320152009-03-21T10:27:00.000-07:002009-03-21T10:27:00.000-07:00I can totally relate - I often get frustrated when...I can totally relate - I often get frustrated when my husband doesn't respond to me the way I think he should. It's amazing how different what we want can be from what we actually need. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed your quality time with the Food Network! I find Paula Deen cures most ills. (ICLW)Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07834180918581781729noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1618559263667408983.post-83171215302648634052009-03-20T17:30:00.000-07:002009-03-20T17:30:00.000-07:00Hi...I came across your blog last week while resea...Hi...I came across your blog last week while researching infertility. My husband and I have been married for four years...trying to conceive for over a year and found out last week that the chances of us conceiving are unlikely. Your blog is a Godsend...makes me feel not as alone in this journey. God bless you and I'll be praying for you! Thanks for sharing!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1618559263667408983.post-42517861022879610312009-03-19T15:14:00.000-07:002009-03-19T15:14:00.000-07:00Aww what a cute thing to say! I hated that about n...Aww what a cute thing to say! I hated that about not being a mom, everyone assumes you are a no nothing newlywed when really you've been married longer the most of them probably! I think the hard thing for me at least was really believing I was of just as much worth as the women with lots of kids.Mekahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09133487619932426670noreply@blogger.com